walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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