Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Randomize
