Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
