If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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