she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Boobs are out for the taking
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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