I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
