don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
He felt like a one man threesome
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
