I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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