but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
