Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
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