Texts From Last Night

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  (937): View more from Ohio

  How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?

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  (937): How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink? http://tfl.nu/zmgw
  Replies (61) Good night (3794) Bad night (1148)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.

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  (215): the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says. http://tfl.nu/scvs
  Replies (54) Good night (4411) Bad night (772)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest

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  (518): Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest http://tfl.nu/34vq
  Replies (12) Good night (2809) Bad night (814)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends

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  (814): Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends http://tfl.nu/5yet
  Replies (77) Good night (7564) Bad night (1274)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.

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  (506): I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer? (902): the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka. http://tfl.nu/rxlv
  Replies (16) Good night (10578) Bad night (1248)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.

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  (214): For those pictures, I will suffer this headache. http://tfl.nu/al31
  Replies (2) Good night (3342) Bad night (976)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis

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  (828): Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis http://tfl.nu/fz5v
  Replies (6) Good night (6062) Bad night (887)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?

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  (501): My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class? http://tfl.nu/2kq9
  Replies (10) Good night (935) Bad night (3100)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.

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  (780): I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past. http://tfl.nu/8nfc
  Replies (3) Good night (1515) Bad night (710)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"

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  (270): My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50" http://tfl.nu/q36v
  Replies (11) Good night (1886) Bad night (579)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.

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  (214): You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS. http://tfl.nu/zazd
  Replies (1) Good night (1534) Bad night (397)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice

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  (607): I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice http://tfl.nu/kf5f
  Replies (1) Good night (496) Bad night (642)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.

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  (312): His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30. http://tfl.nu/n2s4
  Replies (1) Good night (337) Bad night (654)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner

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  (717): sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner http://tfl.nu/onjq
  Replies (4) Good night (580) Bad night (307)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?

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  (989): I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for? http://tfl.nu/8a6x
  Replies (5) Good night (498) Bad night (156)

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