Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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