Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize