did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Randomize