Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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