Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
