i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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