there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
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