i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
