dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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