Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
did i walk over a car last night?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
