I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
