No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
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