the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
