I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
