Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
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Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
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With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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