alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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