508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize