Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
