so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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