I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I intend to get homeless drunk
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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