I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
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