i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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