I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Your cock deserves a montage
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
