p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
