Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
