3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
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