Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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