Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
