no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize