Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Terrible idea I love it
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize