8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize
