How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
