Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
