the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
i think my cat just said my name.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I need to wash the frat house off of me
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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