She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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