I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize