yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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