I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I'm always down for nudity.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
