we made out on top of his cat.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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