nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
